Never enough

My son is home from college on summer break, for three weeks. And let's face it - I do A LOT for him. That usually translates to money, and also though translates to time and effort. 

Do I need to explain myself? Fine, I will.

Money: He asks for money and to the best of my ability, I send him money. He needs food, and he has not managed his money like a responsible person, but yeah, he is 20 and not brain-developed yet. Sure. He has a job. But I suppose that weed is a priority. It's college, after all.

Time: He wants me to take off the busiest summer wedding day (I'm a wedding officiant) (June 1 - a Saturday) to help him move into his new apartment that he's "renting" (or maybe I am, because I'm paying for it, right?) with is 19 year old girlfriend (who never says thank you, who was mean to my youngest daughter and made her cry, who is clearly (to me, yeah I know) way less evolved than my son, who is not evolved at all). Oh yes of course I am paying the rent, which is $110/month more than his current apartment (which has a lease that's not done for 2 months, so that means I'm also paying that lease along with the current one -fml). And so, when I said I can take off 5/31-6/1, and fit whatever into the minivan, along with him and his gf, his response was that I'm not doing enough, and that he and his gf's parents talked about me as said gf's parents drove them home for summer break - for three weeks - on the ride home from Pittsburgh, discussing how they are wishing I was more friendly to his gf. (I feel like a grrrr is in order now). I wished her a happy birthday. I am nice to her. I  brought him and her back to school after spring break... nothing matters I guess.

Effort: Wtf am I supposed to do here to be enough for him? He wants me to suck up to his girlfriends' parents somehow? Look, these babies are NOT married, and should not be (maybe ever.) Her parents have never tried to make friends with me (not that I have any friends, but that's another matter). They've never contacted me about anything related to these kids. Their daughter is their only child, and from what she's said tearfully at my house, they hate her. Of course they don't, but she's so freaking immature, of course she said that. 

It's so stressful, frankly, to always feel that I'm not enough, that I'm not doing enough, for him. But why do I feel this is important anyway? I'm the mom. I am in charge. He is so freaking lucky to have his rent and tuition paid, and money for food and gas and tuition. But again, his immature, undeveloped brain won't allow him to see what is right there, and why, oh why, do I take it so personally? Fuck.

He's home for three weeks. He came home, argued with me, took a shower, and took out the car (how convenient that I paid for this, and his (double the family's) insurance is also covered) to visit his friends, the car was waiting for him, ready and he had $20 cash handed to him for gas. What is wrong with me? 

Do I need to pay for approval from my immature son?

It's all rubbing me wrong. Anyone relate?